As September rolls around, our social media feeds are filled with smiling children, crisp uniforms, and heartwarming 'first day back' photos. For many families, back to school is a time of excitement and anticipation, marking the start of a new school year, new friendships, and fresh opportunities. But behind the smiles and picture-perfect moments, there’s another story that often goes unnoticed.
For a growing number of families, especially those with children who struggle with anxiety and/or are neurodiverse, this time of year can be incredibly challenging. Instead of the usual excitement, the build-up to the school year can bring about sleepless nights, worry, and an overwhelming sense of uncertainty. While the other parents celebrate, these families are navigating an entirely different reality, one where anxiety and school avoidance are all too familiar.
The Hidden Struggles Behind the School Gates
The truth is, for many children with anxiety, autism, ADHD, or other neurodiverse conditions, the school environment can be overwhelming. The sensory overload of noisy classrooms, social pressures, and rigid routines can make attending school feel impossible. While most children are eager to return to their friends and classrooms, some face each school day with dread, struggling to manage the anxiety that comes with it.
For these children, simply getting out of bed in the morning or stepping through the school gates can be a monumental task. And for their parents and carers, the emotional toll is immense. Seeing your child struggle, knowing how hard they’re trying, and feeling powerless to make it better—it’s something no parent wants to go through.
Supporting Neurodiverse and Anxious Children
The conversation around mental health and neurodiversity in schools is growing, but there is still much to be done. While some schools are becoming more inclusive and supportive of neurodiverse children, others may not yet have the resources or understanding needed to accommodate their needs. This can leave families feeling isolated, as if they’re battling the system just to ensure their child gets the education they deserve.
If you’re a parent or carer whose child is struggling with school anxiety or is unable to attend due to their neurodiverse needs, I want you to know this: I see you. I know how difficult this time of year can be. While many families are snapping photos and celebrating, your experience matters too. It’s important to recognise that not every child’s back-to-school journey looks the same.
You Are Not Alone
For parents in this position, it can sometimes feel like you’re the only one. But you’re not. There are countless other families going through the same struggles, facing the same questions, and feeling the same emotions. Your efforts to support your child, to advocate for their needs, and to navigate a system that can often feel unkind, are seen and valued.
This week, as many celebrate the return to school, I am thinking especially of those families who are facing a different set of challenges. It’s important to acknowledge the courage and resilience it takes to support a child with anxiety or a neurodiverse condition. Whether your child is heading back to school, staying home, or something in between, know that you’re doing the best you can—and that’s more than enough.
How Can We Support Families Facing These Challenges?
Raising awareness and offering support to families with neurodiverse children and those dealing with anxiety is essential. Schools and communities can play a huge role in creating a more inclusive environment, where children of all abilities feel safe and supported. If you're reading this and know a family facing these challenges, reach out. A kind word or a simple "How can I help?" can make all the difference.
Additionally, schools must continue to develop and implement inclusive policies that take into account the needs of neurodiverse students and those struggling with mental health challenges. From flexible learning environments to specialist support, there are many ways schools can help ease the anxiety of going back to school.
Final Thoughts
As we move into the new school year, let’s remember that every child’s journey is unique. For some, school is a source of joy and excitement. For others, it’s a source of stress and anxiety. Both experiences are valid, and both deserve our attention and understanding.
To all the parents and carers supporting children through anxiety, neurodiversity, or school avoidance, I want you to know that you’re not alone. Your love, dedication, and unwavering support are making a difference—even on the days when it feels like a battle. Keep going, and remember that your child’s path, no matter how different it may look, is just as important and valuable.